‘Devastated’ mum starts furious debate after her daughter gets a tattoo sleeve

A British mother has sparked a fierce debate online after asking whether she has the right to feel upset over her grown-up daughter’s body modifications, prompting some people to sympathise, and others to say she should ‘get a grip’.

The anonymous woman, who took to parenting platform Mumsnet to ask others for their opinion, revealed that her daughter had been adding piercings and tattoos to her body for a while, but the full sleeve pushed her mother over the edge.

She explained that she had tried to come to terms with her daughter’s choices, and while she was ‘ok’ with the piercings and smaller tattoos, she had cried in private over the larger inkings.

She asked forum users whether she would be unreasonable to be ‘devastated by my 26 yr old daughters tattoos?’ 

A woman took to Mumsnet to ask whether she was justified in her devastation after her daughter (not pictured) covered her arm with a full sleeve of tattoos 

She explained that she had been fine with her daughter’s body modifications so far, but felt a sleeve was ‘bloody awful’

Responses were mixed – some commenters were outraged at the mother’s intrusive feelings about her adult child’s self expression, while others said they would also be sad to see their offspring ruin ‘perfect skin’.  

The mother said: ‘I hate them. Today she showed me her new ‘sleeve’. It’s big black bold and bloody awful. 

‘She already has numerous tattoos and they’re getting bigger each time. She seems addicted. I don’t like tattoos. I don’t have to like them. That’s my choice.

‘I’ve cried over it/her in private! I’ve read up about parents reactions to our kids tattoos. And we are supposed to be happy that they are expressing themselves. But I’m struggling with that. 

‘I was ok with a few, ok with all the piercings… but the sleeve is too far. In my opinion. Does anyone else feel like me or am I the b****h mother from hell? 

Some commenters were outraged that the mother had such strong views on her daughter’s tattoos and asked why she cared so much

Some commenters on the post were shocked that the mother had such strong feelings about something that’s not her decision.

One person said: ‘At 26 I don’t really think it’s any of your business what she does with her body. You don’t have to like them but whether it’s ‘too far’ is not for you to decide.’

Another agreed, saying: ‘You don’t have to like them. Nobody is forcing you to. But as she’s 26, it’s absolutely none of your business. 

‘What does it matter if you do or don’t like them? What does crying over them achieve?’  

A third person commented: ‘Devastated seems rather OTT. Her body, her choice. Why do you care so much about something that doesn’t affect you one iota?’

Some commenters sympathised with the mother and revealed that they too would be upset if their children got sleeves

Other posters, who mostly appeared to be parents themselves, agreed with the woman, admitting they would also be upset.

One said: ‘I agree with you, OP. I’d be devastated if my children ruined their gorgeous perfect skins with tattoos, never mind a ‘sleeve’.’

Another added: ‘Poor you. I hate them too and in your position I would be devastated.’    

And another likened getting tattoos to scribbling over art: ‘There isn’t much you can do, but I don’t think it’s odd to feel upset when your child, who you love in such a very embodied way, does things to irreversibly change that healthy body, and almost, it seems, to cover it up.

‘It’s almost like someone drew in indelible pen all over the Mona Lisa. And you are Leonardo.’