“Hatta Sequin Yama” is a stark scene for the star Ahmed Zaki in the movie “The Promised Night” when he learns of his mother’s marriage again after his father, which excavated a cruel scene when the idea of marriage for the mother and her sons, especially males, is repeated, who are jealous of the mother and that another man replaces their father.
The mother faces confusion about how to inform her children of her decision to remarry, and she is afraid of the nature of their relationship with her new husband, so “The Seventh Day” reviews with community development consultant Dr. Ashjan Nabil steps that may make the children accept the idea of a second marriage, explaining that children from the age of 10 years and above. They need to accept the husband but children younger than 10 only need intimacy because they are not seriously aware of it.
The promised night
Choose the right person
The community development expert said that the mother should initially choose a person who is suitable as a father for her children, not just a husband, who accepts them greatly and does not have feelings of distress or anger when he is with them.
At the beginning of the relationship or the marriage project, she must put the future husband through several tests to study the extent of his acceptance of her children and his ability to bear them, because he will be a substitute for the father and not just a husband for her.
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Relationship Strengthening
In order to consolidate the relationship between her future husband and her children, especially if there are males among them, she must make them depend on him in some matters. They spend time with him in the framework of their normal day.
Give them a chance to talk about their feelings
It is important that you sit down with your children and give them the opportunity to talk about their feelings, even their fears about this step. Tell them that it is okay for them to feel jealous or worried about the change in their life. Hear their fears, as some of them may be unfounded and you can reassure them about them.
The community development expert warned against mocking or belittling the child’s feelings or fears, which is the mistake many make when talking about the child’s jealousy becomes a joke in front of others.
Give them safety
One of the most important concerns of the children upon the second marriage of the mother is their concerns about the change of the mother with them or the lack of interest in them. It is necessary to talk to them that their position with you will not change at all and that the nature of your love for them is different from your love for the husband. It is also important to reassure them about their relationship with their father and that the new marriage will not affect their relationship with him, or with his family if he is deceased.
