Although it is difficult to transfer good qualities from one person to another, raising children to be patient is not impossible, even in a world where most things are available to everyone.
By following some steps and practicing some exercises, the child can realize that patience is a virtue that bears fruit, and learn to differentiate between what is worth waiting for, and what wisdom requires bypassing it and not adding time to it.
Teach the child patience and endurance
Tunisian researcher Widad Riahi says that teaching children patience and endurance is a necessity, especially since many parents suffer from their children’s lack of responsibility and lack of patience in their daily lives, whether waiting for meals, completing schoolwork, completing household tasks, etc.
Widad, a children’s educator who holds a doctorate in the field of culture and civilizations, explained that “patience is a trait that can be instilled in children’s hearts, and it is a necessary skill for them to mature, as it helps develop thinking skills and find solutions to the obstacles and problems they face.”
She pointed out that “patience and endurance are two important lessons that a child must learn because they are among his basic skills. Patience gives the child a sense of inner peace, strengthens his personality, and makes him satisfied with what he achieves. When we talk about endurance, we usually think of physical strength rather than emotional stability or… Mental and psychological, although these are important things that a child should know, because they help him a lot when he stumbles.”
What is patience?
Children from birth to 6 years old act out of their immediate desires, and do not know how to wait, so what is patience?
Patience is defined as the ability to endure suffering and take things simply. It is also the ability to do difficult or detailed things, and it is also the ability to wait for the things we want.
Writer Jill Belsky, in a report published by the Understood website, shows that children run out of patience from time to time, especially young ones. Some children are impulsive and have difficulty waiting their turn. But when older children, over the age of 6, become impatient, they may need extra support.
Why do children get impatient?
Most children get impatient from time to time. But when it happens all the time, there may be another reason. The common cause is impulsivity. Impulsive children “act out” and have difficulty thinking calmly before they act.
Children may struggle to wait their turn if they have trouble understanding and following social rules, and may interrupt the speaker so they can immediately share their thoughts, according to author Belsky.
How do we help an impatient child?
We should take a closer look at the child’s impatience. Does it happen repeatedly at the same time or day? Or does it happen in certain situations? Writer Belsky advises writing down what you notice.
Taking notes makes it easier for parents, teachers, and others to share what they see and come up with strategies to help at home and at school. It’s also a good idea for parents and caregivers to share concerns about behavior with their child’s doctor, social worker or psychologist.
When the child “is patient,” he must be motivated by praising him for this. For example, say to him: “Thank you for waiting quietly until it is your turn to speak,” according to Belsky’s advice.
How do I teach my children patience?
A question that occupies the minds of many mothers, especially since lack of patience is a natural trait in children’s personalities, given that they do not realize time, which means that waiting for them seems long, no matter how short the period.
According to the Spanish newspaper “El Mundo”, in an era in which we find everything we want at hand, adults, including parents, suffer from impatience, as we – all of us – are victims of the age of speed. When we need a new phone charger, we order it from an online store that delivers it to us in less than a minute. From 24 hours. When we run out of something at home, we will find a shopping center open until late at night, ready to fulfill any of our desires.
So how do we teach our children to be patient if it is difficult even for us adults?
The main key to teaching your child patience is to be a role model. How can we ask children to wait calmly if we ourselves feel anxious when we have to wait in line to buy something? If our children see that we are able to be patient, they will gradually learn the same thing.
The Spanish newspaper stressed the importance of practicing daily at home or in everyday situations. The habit of giving them everything they want “right away” encourages them to be impatient.
That’s why we have to estimate the appropriate time for each task. For example, if morning is a difficult time for us because our children are slow to eat breakfast, we can wake them up a little earlier to buy more time.
Thus, the child will learn many things, such as organization, planning, and controlling feelings of anxiety and tension.
Because children do not know the meaning of time yet, there is no point in asking them to give you 5 or 10 minutes. It’s easier to say something like, “We’ll go to the park after we put the toys away.” Or “Now that you’ve waited for me to finish tidying the kitchen, we can go for a walk.”
When they get a little older, it is a good idea to give them a watch and tell them the exact time for what they want, and it is better to start with close appointments so they can check that time is passing and that their patience is being rewarded.
Beware of impatience!
Experts advise against responding to children’s requests that are inappropriate or reflect impatience. If the child asks you for something or gets angry, you must remind him that everything has a deadline, so that he understands that waiting is part of life.
One of the useful ways to teach a child patience is the calendar, especially when we have to deal with things that will happen after days or weeks, and in this way we avoid the repeated questions “when?”; The child can be invited to specify the desired date and cross out each passing day to have a temporary reference.
Specialists believe that there is a strong link between a person’s ability to be patient and his ability to control himself, so they have developed methods that accustom the child to waiting for a longer period, and that mothers can implement them, as long as they want to raise their children to be patient and self-control, according to the “Super Mama” website, including:
Games that teach children patience
There are many games that can teach children patience starting from a young age, and they increase endurance and avoid feelings of anger, when waiting, whether inside the doctor’s office or in the supermarket, and even at home.
Here are the best games to teach patience for children. They are inexpensive and you can create something similar to them:
Puzzle game: Puzzle games teach patience, and there are many types Puzzle gamesChoose what your child prefers and what suits his age.
- Train transportation activity: Some activities teach the child a life skill through play, and the dropper activity teaches the child patience. As the pictures show, for this game we need a cup half-filled with water, an empty cup, and a dropper. The child begins to transfer water from the dropper from one cup to another. This activity teaches him patience, in addition to strengthening his hand and finger muscles, and confidence in his abilities.
- Learn chess: Game Chess It has many cognitive and mental benefits, and with children in particular it is a way to develop their logical and strategic thinking and teach the child patience. It strengthens the child’s abilities to estimate the positions of others and their response and to arrange their movements accordingly, and ultimately progress towards their primary goal. Perhaps teachers and parents know more than others what chess develops in skills. Their children, in particular, among all the skills and abilities that studies indicate are capable of developing chess.
- AInterested in plants: Educational guide Thimar Arafat confirms to Al Jazeera Net that “the child is taught agricultural methods using simple and available tools, and this activity is considered one of the most beloved activities among young people,” pointing out that “Caring for plants It teaches the child patience, because children are always in a hurry and like to have their requests and needs met quickly, and by observing the planting of any plant, whether by planting grains with cotton and dirt or a rose at home, watering it and observing it every day until it grows, the child will then feel a sense of accomplishment as he learns about the growth of the plant.
- Create games that occupy your child: The creative mother seeks to complete her work and household tasks while keeping her child busy, by trying Creating games Keep him playing for long periods, and teach him patience and waiting at the same time, including:
- Designate a wall for him to draw, with a large area that suits his height without obstacles in the area designated for drawing.
- Let your child clean his toys, provide towels to dry them, and allocate a place to arrange them.
- If you are dedicating a play rug, you can design ways on it with your child, so that he can play with his cars on it.
- Toy tent: Help your child design his tent or castle, and fill it with many of the toys needed to design his own city.